Red Elvises in Tuscon
September 23, 2006

Compelled To Rock Even Harder
By Audrey Lynn

Turned onto the Red Elvises at the tender age of 13 I was already a huge fan. I blew out a few copies of the Six String Samurai soundtrack as well as I Wanna See You Belly Dance and Better Than Sex. I loved them, they defined pure rock! They were an amalgamation of everything I loved about rockabilly, psycho-billy, swing and early rock acts like Jerry Lee Louis and Elvis Presley. The sound was fresh, it was hip and it kicked you right in the balls every time you listened to it. The way the Red Elvises sound is the way you feel when you’re driving 120 miles an hour through a school zone…ALIVE!!

Needless to say when I was 19 they came through Tucson, and alas, no fake ID! I had to sit at home and console myself with my good friend Jack Daniels that yes one day we would be old enough to go and see our heroes perform on stage. The night dragged on, I got drunker, the cigarettes in my pack dwindled and I was feeling extremely sorry for myself. My friends came home around 2 AM, stinking drunk and screaming about how amazing the Red Elvises had been, how they had never seen any live act so engaging, so amazing. They talked about the crowd participation during songs, and reenacted dances for me. All the while a dull homicidal haze was falling before my eyes, ‘WHY GOD AM I NOT 21, WHY WAS I DENIED SUCH AN AMAZING EXPIRENCE?!” Soon the drunkards started dropping off and I was left in a house full of sleeping fools with a heavy heart. I had been unable to see the one band that rocked my world the hardest.

The next couple of weeks were torturous; I would see mutual friends and they would talk about the show as I would sit in a quiet stupor jealous of their experience. My friend sat across from me at a table one day with his Red Elvises t-shirt on and reassured me that they would be back and I would be able to see them. I was doubtful because how often do amazing acts like the Red Elvises come to a place like Tucson any way?

Life continued, my friends found new things to talk about and I tucked my disappointment back into the soft folds of memory. I listened to my albums and drove my car really fast to them. Life was par and I was okay with just having the albums. I turned 21 without much ado. I hadn’t felt any differently the morning of my birthday I just continued on. Without the slightest hope that the Red Elvises would come to my Podunk town.

My boyfriend’s cousin relayed news of the show to me and I immediately started hyperventilating. All of the sudden I believed that the rock gods answered prayers. The next morning I ran out and got tickets, I told my best friend that she and her boyfriend had to come with me, that they would have an amazing time. I tried to convey the pure coolness of the Red Elvises to them, but told them that coming to the show would prove my point in a way language failed to. She agreed to buy tickets but made me give her my albums so she could opt out if she thought they were terrible.

I trudged through the next two weeks at work, the days ticked by at an anguishing pace, they never seemed to end. My school work was piling up and nothing was coming together correctly. I was simply too excited to see the Red Elvises. My friend returned my albums to me and said she was excited to see them too, that she loved their music. I told her everything I knew about them right there on the spot like some gushing tween gabbing about the latest boy band. She laughed at me and walked away.

Finally the night of the show arrived, I got in the van with the boyfriend and loaded it up with our friends. I was so excited I chain-smoked the whole way there. As we were walking past the window of Plush I peeking inside and I saw Oleg Bernov’s gigantic red Bass Balalaika and almost dropped dead! I couldn’t believe that the moment had come where I would see my favorite band finally!

We got into Plush and through the will call line, my friend and I started with cranberry and vodkas and seven and sevens. We sat around chatting with people we knew from work and around town. My friend and her boyfriend had never heard the band and had now idea how diverse the fan base was. Her boyfriend leaned over and said to me, ‘There’s a lot of old people here.’ I just looked at him and laughed. I knew once the music started his mind would be blown!

Soon the lights dimmed and the crowded bar’s patrons crushed in even closer together, the band came out and a scream let loose from the lungs of the faithful fans in Tucson. My eyes grew large and my pupils’ dilated, this was better than any drug I had ever ingested!

THE ROCKING COMMENCED! I was a mad dancing fool (the Vodka helped quite a bit) I was all over the place. We screamed the lyrics to ‘Sad Cowboy Song’, ‘I Wanna See You Belly Dance’, and ‘Rocket Man’; we danced our asses off to ‘Closet Disco Dancer’, ‘Love Rocket’ and especially enjoyed the dance for ‘Sex in Paradise’. The whole time we were watching the band it was like we were sucked in to this alternate universe where no one, nothing could touch this band. That no one I had ever seen had rocked harder, sounded rawer, or been more passionate about their craft. They had the whole bar under their thumb and we loved them for it. They rocked for us and we rocked for them, it was music plain and simple!

We screamed, we danced, we shook our tail feathers and too quickly it was over. Too quickly was silence ringing in my ears. My companeros and I stood looking at the stage dripping with sweat as gigantic grins played across our faces. Though we had been to many shows, danced our asses off more then once, there had never been a time where it meant more, or was more fulfilling to us than at this one show. We felt included in something bigger, something better. There was something important about our favorite band, and it was their soul!

We walked out of the club and headed for the nearest late night food joint, cigarettes hanging from our lips, muscles screaming their protests, hearts full of joy. Suddenly I head my phone ringing .Retrieving it from my pocket I saw that it was my little brother calling, he was just 19, I answered the phone. ‘How was the show!” he exclaimed. He had been sitting at home, sans fake ID and a heavy heart because he could not go with me. “Amazing!” I said, with just a touch of sadness to my voice. The universe had come full circle.

Good job Audrey!! Keep the submissions coming!

Thanks guys for A Wonderful night!